I have let feelings run me for the last couple of weeks. In this case, it was a bad idea.
Why a bad idea?
Because my thoughts were running the show, unsupervised, like a toddler with scissors, not meaning to cause harm but….
I’m not even talking about “big feelings”. I don’t have a major crisis going on right now. No. My feelings are small everyday ones and they have been a bit debilitating.
Feelings of tiredness, crankiness, doubt, overwhelm, “should do’s”, guilt, shame, avoidance, discouragement, all resulted in too much Facebook time (a.k.a numbing), no progress in my business, overeating, wanting to sleep more, being gossipy and believing myself when I excuse my behaviour and convince myself it is self care when I don’t get the work done, AGAIN.
A minor blip in my landscape, I get it, but it didn’t feel good and it took me away from being me, and from creating my future.
For the past few years I have been mindful of my thoughts and actions and it has been life changing. Prior to this change I suspect I spent months and maybe even years in a haze of indecisiveness and confusion, self inflicted, even self serving, but so stifling and little to no forward movement.
And so I have learned that feelings should not be left to their own devices. Unchallenged. Unexamined. No, no, no.
We need to be aware that it is our thoughts that cause our feelings.
It was 2 weeks of basically feeling “I’m not good enough to do this” which was caused by what I was thinking.
Thank goodness!!! Because my thoughts, I can do something about that!!
For the last 2 mornings I have returned to visioning and affirmations being the first things I do when I wake up. It replaces waking up and thinking “what do I need to do today? I don’t think there’s much point though.”
Only I am aware of the crazy insane mess that lives inside my head and only I am responsible for cleaning it up. Same goes for you and what’s going on inside your head.
Try it. Pick a negative feeling you have about a relative. I’m guessing you believe your feelings about this person is their fault and something they are doing.
Let’s imagine your mother-in-law makes snide comments about your parenting. Whatever you feel about that is coming from YOUR thinking. If you and I were in the exact same situation, we would both feel, and therefore act, differently about it.
You cannot control another person or guess what their thinking is behind their actions – that’s their own cleaning job, should they choose to accept it. Once you understand that it is your own thinking causing your feelings, you are “response-able” to change it. If you want to that is.
Sometimes we don’t want to change our thoughts because we want to be mad at them, but be aware that this is a thought and decision also.
When you do want to feel differently, you will have to think differently.
Easy peasy? Well……that depends how you think about it ;).
Do the work. You are worth it.
Hugs, Vicky xx