I’m thinking to myself, if I don’t sign up and the spots fill up and I miss a spot I’m going to be so disappointed.

Anticipating the feeling of disappointing I get straight on that website, fill in all my info and credit card details and eagerly and happily hit the “pay now” button.

I’m signed up. I’m so excited. I call and tell my hubby. I’m giggly. I tell a few friends.

I put the phone down and I sit down, I notice I’ve been pacing. I’m starting to feel a bit sick. Oh my, should I put my head between my knees? Should I run for the washroom. I’m not feeling so good. What have I done?????

When I tell you what got me so riled up and excited enough to sign up and then anxious and frightened enough to feel ill you’ll probably think “what’s the big deal?” For me though it’s a bit out of my comfort zone and, more than that, if this doesn’t go well it could set back a big, HUGE, dream that has been simmering in me for years.

So, what did I do?

I signed up as a crafter at 2 shows!!!

I’m not a crafter!

The life coach in me is already trying to coach me around that last statement, but right now I need to profess my non-craftiness as a safety net. A soft landing space just in case I put my heart and soul into making products that i think people will love and then……nothing. People take a cursory glance, offer a kind smile, and keep on going. Oh the despair.

I’m not sure where this all started.

Was it in my mid thirties when I went from owning about 5 books to now owning well over 200? Why the sudden need to learn? The book store became my new fave place to spend a quiet hour.

Was it when I started looking into psychology, originally because I was interested in the thoughts and processes of people in general and especially so in my 3 girls? I ultimately studied and certified as a life coach. Which was life changing for me and people around me as a result of what I learned.

Was it the evidence that having a destination makes for purposeful and gainful action, which ultimately took me to the enormous planner community? Which has amazing stationery products!! And c’mon – stationery – it’s just awesome!!!

So a slight refinement of my dream to have a book store with a life coaching component, which now is expanding to include stationery, of which many of the products will be of my own creation, brings me to where I am now….

…with the stationery designer / producers version of writers block!!

I went from having fun with creativity to suddenly having no idea what to make. And I need to make A LOT (y’know, just in case people like what I’ve got to offer). I’ll get over it with a bit of self-coaching.

So, I’m officially putting a stake in the ground and proclaiming this the start of my journey in chasing my dream.

It could be long. It will likely get ugly.

But more than anything it’s important that I go for it. It certainly won’t happen any other way.

If you want to keep tabs on my journey and the self-coaching I do on myself to keep my head in the game then make sure to subscribe.

Also, think about what dream you’d like to be going after. Put it in the comments as your first step in going for it.

You’re so worth it.

Hugs, Vicky xxxxx